Mommy of TWO!

A friend posted this as a comment to one of my blog posts during my pregnancy with Reagan:

Loving Two

I walk along holding your 2-year-old hand,
basking in the glow of our magical relationship.
Suddenly I feel a kick from within,
as if to remind me that our time alone is limited.
And I wonder, how could I love another child as I love you?

Then she is born, and I watch you.
I watch as the pain you feel at having to
share me as you have never shared me before.
I hear you telling me in your own way,
"Please love only me" and
I hear myself telling you in mine "I can't".
Knowing in fact that I never can again.
You cry, I cry with you.
I almost see our baby as an intruder
on the precious relationship we once shared.
A relationship we can never have again.

But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached
to that new being, and feeling almost guilty.
I'm afraid to let you see me enjoying her
-- as though I am betraying you.
But then I notice your resentment change, first to curiosity,
then to protectiveness, finally to genuine affection.
More days pass, and we are settling into a new routine.
The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast.
But something is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just us two.

There are new times -- only now we are three.
I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other,
touch each other. I watch how she adores you, as I have for so long.
I see how excited you are by each of her new accomplishments.
I begin to realize that I haven't taken something from you,
I've given something to you.
I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of you.
I find that my love for each of you is as different as you are,
but equally strong.
And my question is finally answered to my amazement.

Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you, only differently.
And although I realize that you may have to share my time,
I know you'll never share my love.
There's enough of that for both of you --
you each have your own supply.

I love you both and I thank you both for blessing my life.

Author Unknown


While I was pregnant with Reagan, I really struggled with how I would feel having another baby to love and having to divide my love and time between two children. I could not imagine being able to love another person as much as I loved Jocelyn. I worried so much about how Jocelyn would handle having a sister and sharing her Mommy. That worry continued, even in the weeks after Reagan was first born, but it has slowly faded as I have come to realize everything is fine. Jocelyn has not been adversely effected. New routines have formed. Our family has become even better with the addition of Reagan. I love to watch the girls interact with each other! I love the way Reagan looks at her big sister.

This is one of the best pictures. I could look at it a thousand times a day, but I don't have to because I have them here with me in real life, and I get to see Reagan look at her sister like this every day! What a Blessing!
I'm still amazed that it has been possible for me to love another child just as much as I love Jocelyn. Everyone was so right. Your heart grows. It's still growing as I find new things every day that I love about my girls.

Thank you, Maria, for posting that poem it is so true and I can relate to every sentence in it! Thank you, God, for blessing me with these two precious little girls.